Stress Relievers

WARNING: For 18 and above . ( dont say i never warn u..hehehe)

Stress Reliever #1

Wife : You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?

Hubby : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.

Wife : You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself,
"What other problem can there be greater than this one?"
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Stress Reliever # 2

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.

Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.

Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
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Stress Reliever # 3

Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.

Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.

Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
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Stress Reliever # 4

Wife to husband: "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"

Husband to wife: "Golfing with friends, my dear."

Wife to husband: "What? At 2 am?!"

Husband to wife: "Yes, We used night clubs."
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Stress Reliever # 5

Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."

Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
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Stress Reliever # 6

A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..

"My father grows beans," said one student.

"My father cooks beans," said another.

Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."
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Stress Reliever # 7

Interviewer to Millionaire: "To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire to?"

Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."

Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

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> > Stress Reliever # 8
Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.

The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.
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> > Stress Reliever # 9

A husband was asked: Do you talk to your wife after sex?

He replied: Depends, if I can find a phone.
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> > Stress Reliever # 10

Man to wife on wedding night: Are you sure I'm the first man you are sleeping with?

Wife replied: Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others!
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> > Stress Reliever # 11

Why did they stop printing PAMELA ANDERSON stamps in the U.S. ?

Answer: Because people started licking the wrong side.
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> > Stress Reliever # 12

A wife asked her husband: What do you like most in me - my pretty face or my sexy body?

He looked at her from head to toe and replied: I like your sense of humour.
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> > Stress Reliever # 13

Doctor to his lady patient: You look terribly weak and exhausted! Are you having your meals three times a day as I have advised?

Lady replied: Doctor, I thought you said three males a day.

Sorting

i really need to sort a few things inside my head. to relieve unbearable feelings inside. as days passed by, there were so many things i wish i didn't do. or even can it be undone, or backspace it to moralize myself.

i'm craving for new shoe. yezza. i just got my salary few days back, so i dont spent much on the last raya.i've been eyeing this one particular shoe, i pay two times visit to look for it. to me, it is something i cant resist, but it is a big doubt whether im going to use it or not. im not working in corprate world, i dont meet clients, im just a workholic person who seat in front of hell computers doing programming,testing and answering a lot of phone calls perday to resolve production issues. that keep bothering me, to buy or not to buy. buying meaning satisfying my own desire. but will i use it?? its too fancy for a person like me..

i want something like this.



but i used to wear this.

so thus i need a new handbag.. i've been using my jeans handbag for about 1 year already. to me its perfect, and served me well enuff.. not even one tiny little benang pun tercabut.. so that makes me have no more reason to buy new handbag. BUT,people always make an excuse to pass thru. so am i. there was one day, one salesboy look at me with unaffordable-weirdo-f**king look when i usha handbags..he even menjeling when i belek-belek the handbags dekat Isetan...serious shit, that puts my blood up to siling, and i went off teros. I dont want his pity look on me menguasai and membuatkan aku membeli handbag yang aku tanak pun, but to prove that i can afford aku beli. this has happened few times. at the end i regret. so let them be with their arrogant, aku tak peduli. i will only buy things i want.

oh ya, before i went off, aku sempat bercakap dengan kuat nya pada MF " dia ingat kita tak mampu ke?" . kasik mamat tu dengar sikitlah kan.

i do think this jerk should behave more. you are salesperson, why dont you act like one. kenapa nak usha-usha orang macam tu. and dont even judge people by their simple tshirt and jeans appearance. kadang-kadang orang macam ni banyak jugak duit. bukan tak berkemampuan.sigh.and i dont really like nagging salesperson as well. there's one ariani branch punya salesperson. dok follow mana aku pegi, then sebok nak tunjuk itu ini. aku tak sempat tengok lagi dak tunjuk yang lain. just let me be okay, if im interested aku bagitau mana satu aku berkenan... kan senang...

10 days straight stayed at home,has caused me so much weight gaining.mum's cook, ayah's mee goreng, Wan's curry is something i cant disregard.sedapnya mak datuk... macam mana nak tahan.tsk.tsk.so i turn up at Mary Chia again last thurday, hoping for some treatment. memang kena bebellah aku dekat situ.inconsistent datang, main datang ikut sedap hati. tahun ni baru tiga kali datang.huhu...my weight dah naik banyak compare to the last treatment...so they offer me new treatment with one promise, give them 3 months to make it reality.wahhh...aku pun apa lagi. seronoklah dengarkan, 3 bulan bole kurus...hehe...so now i undergo diet program for 1 month, and will be back to Mary Chia this coming 31 Oct to continue the treatment. will share with you apa-apa nanti. =)

even tho Hari Raya is a big bermaafan day,i still unable to clear out things inside my heart.sigh. even i always trust memaafkan orang tu bukan untuk dia, but for your own sake. to heal is to forgive.but hard to apply, indeed.

with rasa rendah diri, saya menyusun jari memohon maaf kalau-kalau ada rakan-rakan yang tersinggung dengan saya. selamat hari raya.

having more than 1 blog, i feel like combining it together NOWWW, so that i have one medium of communication with everybody. takdelah rajin sangat nak update pun kan...

told ya, i really need to sort things inside my head.

Photojournalist

i am looking for one.

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and i want to be one.

photo taken by me, long time ago. click here!
one of my fave.
i wish i can spend more time with photography, to train myself. i've been busy with works @ office, until i have no time for Mike anymore (he's poor sad little guy being abandoned under my table)

oh ya, i really-really looking for one good photojournalist. i always want a wedding to be captured nicely, candid, and can tell a story. like some said, let the photos tell you the story.

i have one in my list. but unaffordable. sekian.

the day!

Today, is the day!

Congratz to both of US.

Pagi tadi aku wish dia, then dia tanya, dah berapa tahun ek? tahla, empat kot, kataku.hehe.sekali betul pulak tekaan aku.hehehe. sounds weird? yup. we never celebrate this before act. tahla, aku pun bukan jenis romantik and tak kisah sangat date ni. aku rasa dia pun sama. so sama-sama tak kisah, jadi memang betul-betul tak kisah lah kan? :p

i dont ask much from you,cukuplah sekadar kasih sayang and kesetiaan sehingga akhir hayat ni. Thanks for being with me. Semoga kita bersama dunia & akhirat.Amin.

p/s: i love you

Glass Vase

i really love the idea of having glass made vase at my dais. Even if it looks too simple to others, i seriously dont mind. hehe....

tapi tak mahu ada batang-batang bunga tu...crystal clear will do for me.

not even with daun-daun hijau tu as a cover

maybe about this big.or a bit bigger. side by side dekat kerusi.

too fancy, huh?

pelamin

by Nas Great Idea
source

i'm speechless. simply stunning!that's it!

ratu tiga hari.ngeeee~

huda called.
huda: babe, cni ade ratu sehari. nak x?
aku: nak.nak.nak.nak..nak... *cakap laju-laju dalam satu nafas*
huda: taulah nak, tayah lah cakap 8x...

cet!

so i got mine! after bersusah payah cari di merata-rata tempat. jawapan yang asyik sama, stok belum sampai.

and... suka sangat itu diary, compact and menyeluruh. plus, ada calendar sampai 2011. macam tau-tau aje. so applicable to me! hehe. i really-really need step by step guide like this. yang aku jumpa selalunya tak bertepatan dengan citarasa. heee~


i'll keep my little-dearie-wedding-diary updated with my progress!
*tak cukup-cukup dengan blog.hehe*

my progress so far? null. hanya menambah isi tabung aje, ni boleh kire progres tak?? weee...~